Friday, May 31, 2013

Learning that I am worthy...

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#operationredbikin with Kassie and Leigh Ann

Ya it's a two post kinda day.
Honestly I was originally not going to post this.
Part of me feels like I shouldn't because I am not where I originally wanted to be.
I will be the first to tell you that these last four or five months I have been riding first class on the struggle bus.
I am exercising like it's my job but my eating hasn't been great and I just don't think I was doing enough.
But...
I really have come a LONG way since having Payton on July 25th of this past year.
I weighed in at a whopping 265 pounds.
Sure part of that was baby, part of that was water, but A LOT of that was unhealthy eating.
What can I say?
I was on bed rest starting at the very beginning of February with nobody to talk to besides myself during the day.
I was bored.
So I ate.
I am 5'2 and it was BAD.
About an hour after I had delivered.
 
This was taken at a Bengals game 11-4-12 and I was weighing about 185 here.
 
My Husband caught a full body picture of me running the sweeper 11-10-12
The same day we had our pictures taken and it's a little less blurry...

In these two pictures above I was still wearing maternity jeans.
Today I can assure you they are gone and are too big =)
 
This past year was the first year I have ever actually lost weight during the Holiday season.
Normally it starts with Halloween candy which leads into Thanksgiving eating and then we all know how hard it is to say no to those delicious sugar cookies during the Christmas season.
Somehow I managed though.
 
New Year's Eve was the best I had felt in a while.
Dare I say I felt thin?
Weighing in at 173.


 
I hit my 100 pound weight loss (actually 102) on February 22nd and that's when things started to get hairy for me.
 
 
I started working out at the gym which most of you are thinking well how could things have gone downhill?
 
 
Well I would say my emotions played a huge part.
I had just lost 100+ pounds which means I can have more of things I want right?
WRONG
 
My eating became out of control again.
So even though I was killing it at the gym I wasn't doing anything for myself because of my bad eating habits.
To make it worse it was all late at night.
I am a rock star during the day but HORRIBLE at night.
 
This led to a reality check a couple of weeks ago when I weighed myself.

It is terribly hard for me to share this picture.
If it's anything I am not though is a fake.
I will always share my successes as well as my fails because that's real life.
This picture was taken for a Biggest Loser Competition that I started on May 1st.
 
I am now down to 173 but I am also learning that it's not all about the number one the scale.
And even with some downfalls I have STILL had some major successes during this time.
 
I ran my first 5k as the new me on March 19th.
I have done quite a few of these but this is the only one I have ever actually trained for.
 
 
 
 
 
 
I ran my first 10k on May 4th.
 
 
 
 
 
 
So although I am not where I wanted to be I have still accomplished and done so many things.
And even though I am not at the weight that I was in February (about 10 pounds heavier) I feel better than I did then.
I feel stronger.
I consider that a win.
 
 
Right:  December 2009
Left:  Last week
 
 
I may not be bikini ready just yet but I can sure shittn' rock the hell out of a skirt =)
 
Regardless I am finding that I am worthy.
I have worked hard.
I never have given up even when things got tough.
I will continue to fight until I get where I want to be. 









19 comments:

  1. You are amazing and your progress is inspirational! Even if not bikini ready in your mind, you've still done an amazing job!

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  2. damm straight you can rock it out in a skirt! and im sure you look hella fine in a bikini too :) you really are such an inspiration, don't forget that!

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  3. What a journey!!! You are just amazing and yes, you can rock a skirt! Your legs look great!

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  4. You are amazing Marcy!! Keep up the fight!! Great things will come to you! And where did you get that white ruffled shirt (cute skirt pic)?? I want!!!!

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  5. The things you've accomplished off the scale are worthy 10000000x more than that dumb number. It doesn't define you as you've shown in these awesome pics. You've gained confidence and it shines through like WHOA. I wish I could rock such a hot skirt as good as you one day! You are one hottt momma :D

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  6. Lookin' good, lady! Great work!

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  7. You look great, and sometimes non-scale victories are way more important than what the number on the silly thing says. Way to go!

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  8. You look great Marcy!! So proud of you!!!

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  9. You rock!!! Very proud of you :)
    I think a lot of people think that losing weight is all about the weight itself, but really its about the person when it's all said & down. Reaching down deep & giving it all you have & more.
    You have done that! Way to go :)

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  10. I too have learned that Im worthy, isnt it the best feeling? Youre doing amazing and I know youre going to succeed :)

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  11. Hey shorty....5'3 right here!!!
    You have worked hard. Thanks for your honesty! We all know and believe you will only continue to improve your worthy self!! :)

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  12. You have come such a long way! Love the progression pics over the past year. Less than a year ago you were 265 pounds and you recently ran a 10K?! You should be so incredibly proud of yourself. Thank you for continuing to inspire me! :)

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  13. It is sooooo easy to get bogged down in the day to day BS. Oh, the scale hasn't moved, my tummy is still jiggly and I have loose skin BUT you have to look at the big picture and how far you've come. You have done an amazing job and even though you've had setbacks, you have never let that stop you. Thank you for putting it all out there and being an inspiration!

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  14. This is EXACTLY what I needed to read. Thank you for sharing!

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  15. way to go!! amazing story! and you look amazing!

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  16. I am so very proud of you sweet girl! Keep your head held high.. I know you have it in you to complete & succeed in all things you put your mind too!

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  17. That is awesome. Keep it up!!!

    I invite you to my blog.

    loyaltofashion.blogspot.com

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  18. Thank you for your honesty. Food battles are so hard but I am so inspired by your not giving up and being a beast in the gym! I run my first 10k in a month.

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  19. So inspiring! And you are totally bikini ready- you look amazing right now and will look even more amazing once you keep rocking it at the gym :) Thanks for being so open and sharing with us!

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