Monday, January 7, 2013

The bad before the good...

If you are anything like me and somebody asks you, "Would you rather have the BAD news or the GOOD news first I always choose the negative before the positive."
I am normally quite funny around these parts and that's what ya'll look forward to.
Unfortunately I do have those day where I just do not have it in me to be the slightest bit funny.
Like at all.
Today is sadly one of those days.
The bad news of the day is that my sweet fur baby boy Jake died over the weekend.
I would be lying if I told you that my heart wasn't broke.
It absolutely is.
He was MY boy.
Up my ass 24/7.
I couldn't go anywhere, not even the bathroom, without him following right behind me.
Worse than my human kids I tell ya!
When we would have company over he would bark until I picked him up.
I loved him.
We only got him a little over three months ago...
He was only three years old...
I was taking him to the vet today.
Could I have done more?
I am a mess.
I am trusting in God that this was his plan for my lil' guy and whatever was wrong with him he is not in pain anymore.
This I know.
I just hate the thought of him dying alone.
Did he know just how much Mama loved him?
I found myself getting out of bed this morning, rubbing my eyes still half asleep, walking down the hallway and actually bending down where Jake's crate used to be to let him go potty... Needless to say I balled like a baby. I sat right there on the floor and lost it. My heart is broke. He was my boy. I hope he knows Mama did love him and I'm sorry he died alone... They don't make many "Jake's" & I will just be grateful that I got to love my fur baby boy the few short months we had him. I am sad he didn't get to see the new house he would have loved the farm...
Photo: This really has been a horrible New Year...  I am absolutely devestated and my heart is broke.  We found my Jakey~Poo dead this morning.  I feel so guilt stricken...  I should have done more....  Could I have done more?  I will never have another animal this hurts way too much...
I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying. You found it hard to sleep.
I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today. Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today, You tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you, that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said "It's me."
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.
It's possible for me to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."
You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew...
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning
and say "Good-night, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out... then come home to be with me.
Love, Momma
{sorry for this horribly sad start but I do want to follow up with some good news.  i had been contacted to participate in this amazing giveaway and below are the details!}
Welcome to the biggest giveaway of 2013! 
All of the incredibly generous ladies below have contributed
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The fine print:
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*Winners of each prize pack will be verified
*You can enter all prize packs
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  1. I am so sorry for your loss. I got teary eyed reading this, Jake sounds just like my baby. Big hugs. If you need anything, let me know.

  2. I totally agree, bad before the good. I am so sorry for your loss!

    Sparkles and Shoes

  3. So sorry about your furbaby. I don't know what I'd do if I lost mine. :(

    Love ya lady!


  4. I am so sorry about your baby :( Our dogs are our little fur babies and part of the family. All dogs go to heaven :) Praying for you my friend!!

  5. I am sorry for your loss lovely lady! He sounds like he was a wonderful little guy!!!! I am sending lots of hugs your way!

  6. I am so sorry love! I teared up at that poem. I love my fur baby and I've lost some good ones, too, so I know how you feel. HUGS!

  7. I'm so sorry lovie! Losing a dog is the worst kind of pain, but any wonderful being that loves so unconditionally goes to a beautiful place <3

  8. Welp, this made me ball this morning. I am so sorry Marcy. Best part about a dog, you can have the worst day in the world, and do something that is embarassing or that you regret and they still come to the door wagging their but for you. Unconditional love.

  9. Sorry for your loss! It always hurts so much to lose a furry friend. And I totally cried my eyes out reading that poem!

  10. Oh my goodness, your little guy is so precious, and I have one of those little snuggle bugs of my own. It was so sad reading about this. I think often about what I will EVER do without my little guy! He is eight and healthy at the moment, but I am so aware of his value in each day. HUGS. BIG HUGE HUGS!

  11. So sorry to hear about your sweet Jake. I know how it is when the pets are extensions of the family and it is devastating to lose them. I am sure he is watching over you...tail a waggin'!

  12. Praying for you momma, loosing a pet is horrible, I have lost 2... but like you said you just have to trust God in ALL things and remember the good times you had with Jake! He was a apart of your life for a reason, whether it was to teach you something or bring some laughter into your life, it will get better! <3

  13. oh i am so so sorry. im so sad for you. :(

  14. Oh Marcy! That poem made me bawl! Your little dude is still with you. It's okay to grieve though. I bawled/ugly-cried (like in-bed-had-to-be-consoled-crying) over my bass (fish) that died last month, less than 2 weeks before Christmas, and I'm still not over it,..actually cried thinking about about him on Friday night. And that was over my fish, any dogs I've lost, pshh, I'm still grieving years later! I get SO attached to my animals! As I said earlier, I definitely know how you feel. Hope things get easier soon.
    Sending good vibes, prayers & positive thoughts your way!

  15. I am so sorry about your doggie. I know it's heartbreaking.

    And dang, that's one helluva giveaway. I'll enter from home tonight and visit some new blogs.

  16. I am so so sorry sweet girl about the loss of your fur baby. I know you loved him & I am sure that he knew you loved him also.

  17. I am so so so so so so so so so so soooorrrrrrrryyyyy. I am sending a HUGE hug and kiss to you to today lady! I cannot imagine the pain you are experiencing. My fur bay is the most important thing to me and I am sure that I would not be able to get out of bed if I had the same news to share with my blog friends. I am so sorry again. My thoughts are with you and Jakey Poo in heaven. Love you girl!

  18. I can't tell you how sorry I am for your loss. My doggies are like babies to me and I would be a giant mess if I lost them. Have you read "rainbow bridge"? If not, look it up now. It helped me when my family dog died 8 years ago. Hugs friend...