Friday, December 14, 2012

Friday's Letters: Marcy's solving #firstworldproblems up in hurrrrrrr

This week has felt like it lasted the span of an entire fucking month.
Over it.
I swear by Monday night I felt like it should already be Friday at beer:30.
Hate that.
During the day I have been so sluggish...
So I slap myself in the face and I am all like...
And then at night I am all like...

Photobucket

Dear self:  You have got to stop being so hard on yourself.  After a half an hour and 9 different outfits {no exaggerating} you finally found something.
BUT the first one was fine.
You don't look like the fatty that you think you do.
SO QUIT BEING SO MEAN.
You stepped on that scale this morning and lost yet another pound.
Oh self just take your own advice for once wouldja ?
Drink a beer and put your IMFUCKINGHAWT pants on.
That's my crazy face if you were wondering.
And yes, I am fucking crazy.
If you don't like it and my snarky self...
BWAHAHAHA
I kid.  I kid.
I honestly have just been looking for an excuse to use this GIF ;)
I know I am obsessed...

Dear Husband:  Thanks for being you.  You rock my socks on a daily basis and I feel kinda bad because I just don't think I tell you that enough.
You are so damn funny and you really do have the BEST personality.
I couldn't have asked for a better life partner.
To: fuckyeahbigang Love: Your biggest fan, RealityTVGIFs. #BigAngLips
But enough with the mush...
QUITFUCKINGSNORINGLIKEAGDFREIGHTTRAINSOMAMACANSLEEP.

Dear Pdiddy aka Payton:  QUIT growing wouldja? 
I seriously cannot handle it.
Every time I see you doing something new I just want to do a serious ugly cry.

Dear PIC:  You are the peanut butta to my jelly, the cheeze to my macaronies, the milk to my chocolatte, the creamer to my coffee, the gas to my tank, the koozie to my beer.
Seriously you are the shit.
And a way better dancer than I...
OBVIOUSLY.
Dear Michy Ultra:  Quit also giving me the ability to think that not only can I do the above but try to also gyrate my PIC...


More importantly though...

My Dearest Blog Betches {New and Old}:  Never, and I mean N TO THE FRAGGN' EVER, put your finger in a lightsocket...

Your welcome.
#firstworldproblems here betches and I am solving them all.

Ooooohhhhh one more one more....

Dear Keek:  QUIT CUTTING ME OFF DAMMIT...

T TO THE G TO THE I TO THE F




8 comments:

  1. You are hilarious. Love your blog...I found you through Nancy Clue. I'm your newest follower! :)

    www.RaisingSteppeSisters.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi! Found your blog through Vintage Modern Wife and I think we should be bff. You're the funniest :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. OMG you are hilarious. Yes I agree - freaking Keek is WAY to short. I feel like I SPEED talk to get all my blabber in. I am also a new follower.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hilarious . OMG moustaches my love all over here <3 ahaha
    Found your blog and I'm a new follower :)
    Noor @Noor's Place

    ReplyDelete
  5. Again... you had my laughing so hard! I'm now following you on Keek! Can't wait to laugh more! Oh, and for the record.... you and your PIC behave much like me and my PIC. haha!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I found your blog through the Vintage Sunshine giveaway and I am so glad I did, I love it and I am now following you!

    xx
    Kelly
    Sparkles and Shoes

    ReplyDelete