Monday, March 21, 2016

What's waiting for you just around the bend...

Life.
It's a funny, funny thing.
One minute you are on Cloud 9...
The lowest weight you have ever been, supporting and encouraging people all around the world...
And then, what seems like the blink of an eye, you have gained 60+ pounds.
You have lost your drive and direction somewhere along the way.
Leaving the house sometimes seems terrifying.
I have found comfort at the bottom of an empty container of ice cream, rather than sweat dripping on the floor beneath me at the gym.

Something happened to me today.
It was almost like the flip of a switch.
I think I am tired.
Tired of feeling like I have to hide, sometimes even from my own Husband.
I want to be the person I was two years ago.
I want people to look at me and be proud of me.
I want somebody to be able to look at me for inspiration.

So here I am, yet again, being extremely vulnerable.
Putting it out there for all to see.
Zero fucks given and zero sugarcoating because that's truly who I am.

Monday, March 21st 2016
Today I woke and put a smile on my face.
I started the day with a 30 second plank that I must admit I did not finish the whole way through.
I am almost to the bottom of my gallon of water and I am staying within my calorie range.
Today was cardio.
10 minutes of arc trainer and 30 minutes of running for .10 of a mile to walking for .10 of a mile at a 1.0 incline.
I will not eat my feelings today.
I am better than that.
I will smile.
I will try my hardest to be positive, even in trying times.

Current Weight:  225 pounds
Goal Weight:  150 pounds

Who's with me?

"You fall, you rise, you make mistakes, you live, you learn. You're human, not perfect. You've been hurt, your you're alive. Think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, and to chase the things you love. Sometimes there is sadness in our journey, but there is also lots of beauty. We must keep putting one foot in front of the other even when we hurt, for we will never know what is waiting for us just around the bend"...
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7 comments:

  1. I swear woman, I could have easily written this post too. Right there with ya (literally... almost at the same weight as you.) Hang in there, we got this!

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  2. I completely agree with how you feel! I just can't commit though! It's so tough!!

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  3. You are awesome and you can do it!! You know this!! Thanks for being honest and real. It helps to know others struggle, too.

    Go get 'em!!

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  4. So glad you are back!!!! You got this! I am trying to do the same.

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