Realization.

I realized two things this morning while strutting my stuff killing myself on the treadmill…

After almost a year out from going to the gym on a regular basis, ya know when it was there waiting for me on the 22^nd floor of my building every day for lunch, I NEED THE GYM.

I am not one of these people that can work out at home.  I just can’t.  I need somewhere to go that isn’t in my home.  A place for me.  Just me.  A place where I am not Mom or Wife or Friend.  A place to let it all go.  I also need routine.  I need structure.  Some people don’t, but I do, and I know that’s okay. 

So today was my first day back in the gym.  The first day of my new routine.  I am hopeful, I am happy, and I am determined. 

This is something I realize won’t ever be handed to me.  My health will never be something I can just do whatever I want and it’s waiting for me all pretty on a shiny silver platter.

I have to work for it.  No, I have to fight for it.  I have to fight hard for it.  There will be sacrifices.  There will be frustrations.  There will probably even be tears.  But in all of that there is beauty to be found.  There is strength to behold.  I can and I will.  I have done it before and I damn well know I can do it again.  Hang with me while I get out of the rut I have been in and back to the person you all know that I can be…

I weighed in this morning at 197.2
Ya please pick that mouth up off the ground right now.
Definitely expecting a lower number next week!
So ready to do the damn thing and get back in my groove :)