182

No beating around the bush here.
I might as well dive right in and tell you all the truth.
You know I don't sugar coat and you know I pretty much lay EVERYTHING out there.
Judge me or love me you will do whatever you choose and I am okay with that.

Little back story in case you are new around here I hit my 100 pound weight loss back in February.
I felt on top of the world to say the least.
I thought that I had my shit under control but oh how I was so wrong.
The problem is after I hit those 100 pounds I became a lot less strict with myself.
A few chips here, a candy bar there, and those bag of peanut butter M&M's I love so dearly later and I am back in a scary territory.
Honestly a territory I didn't ever think I would have to face again.
Silly little me.
I should know better than that.
If this thing were easy I would look like a Victoria Secret Model next week.

You guys may not be able to tell a difference but I can.

Maybe not so much in the look but I can feel it.

It's like I can literally feel the fat taking up residence on my ass.

The picture on the Left is February and the picture on the Right is from today.

Now most of you know I have been on the God awful Prednisone for the wrath of Poison Ivy 2013 which is an obvious weight gain.
I have basically eaten us out of house and home and then some.
I keep blaming it on the Prednisone when really in all reality even if I wasn't on it I would most likely be eating the same way.
Emotions mixed with just poor around choices will do that to you.

I wanted to weigh myself this morning to see where I was at and what I was dealing with.
I knew I had gained and it was just time to face my fears.
I stepped on the scale and took a deep breath and my worst nightmare came true.
I choked back tears as the scale read back a number I haven't seen since back at the beginning of October...
182.0...
Those red numbers have never shined so bright.
They have never been so painful.

How have I gained 20 pounds five months?
How have I been working out and killing myself for nothing?
Because let's be honest that is ALL I am doing right now.

I have got to eat clean.
There are no if, ands, or buts about it.
That is the deal breaker for me.

I am a changed person though.
Old Marcy would have totally given in the towel and most likely before now.
But I am not.
I know I am stronger than that.
I know that I will get to where I want to be.

HARD WORK.
MOTIVATION.
DEDICATION.

So today is a new day, a new hour, a new minute...
A new second.

I have been through so much stress this year that has really been wearing on me.
I refuse to let that stop the progress I have already made.
It's just not in me.

I am a fighter.
I will get past this.
I will say one thing...
I cannot do it alone.
I am not going to lie I need support.
I need people cheering for me and rooting me on.
When I don't have that it's harder for me to focus.

So if anybody is up for the challenge I would love somebody to commit to texting me everynight around 8PM and telling me I don't need the chips, I don't need that candy bar, and I definitely don't need those gosh forsaken peanut butter M&M's...

In other news I will tell you so far this day has started out great other than the weigh-in I had.
I drank two bottles of water before ever leaving the house.
Stopped for coffee and drank my slim-fast on the way to work.
I have a big ass salad for lunch and I will probably do a sinch inch low calorie sub from Subway tonight since it is paper night.
I just need to make the right choices all around.
I have to quit letting the old me mind fuck the new me.

For today's workout it is just going to be a straight run.
I am going to see how far I can go in 35 minutes {35 minutes being my general time alotment for lunch to workout}.
I figured I would link up with PregMeg for Workout Wednesday!

Yesterday I did my kettle ball workout and a slow 1.29 miler.

My tree trunks were KILLING me.

Probably because over half of the workout is squats!

BURN BABY BURN.

 

MARCY'S KILLER KETTLEBELL WORKOUT

 10 AROUND THE WORLDS

 

10 BENT ROWS

 

10 DEAD LIFTS

 

10 FIGURE 8'S

 

10 SWINGS

 

10 FRONT SQUATS

 

10 RUSSIAN TWISTS

 

10 FRENCH CURLS

REPEAT 3 TIMES WITH ZERO BREAKS!!!!

FEEL THE BURN!!!!